Palo Alto Cunt

This isn't an advertisement on Craigslist for some clamydia...

But maybe there is a sickness... Is it just me, or is the Bay Area infested with nosey-bitch-computer-whiz-get-rich-quick-pricks?

A quick stop at Safeway to get the Friday after work essential basketfull of Jagermeister, Tanqueray, sparkling water, cheese and baguette at Safeway was greeted by an employee frantically searching for a mop and dust pan because some Stanford college kids accidently dropped a case of Corona near the entrance on their way out. My quick 2 second joking reply with a smile as I entered, "Why don't you save these guys the beer bong time and just get them a bunch of straws. I'm sure they're willing to help with that." The college kids were roaring with excitement and the Safeway employees just laughed. As messed up as they were on their 'shrooms or whatever was keeping them alive, I knew they wouldn't do that and thought it was just a funny thing to say.

My funny thing to say wasn't funny to one of these nosey bitch, computer whiz, get rich quick pricks. He quickly tapped me on the shoulder and said, "How dare you! These boys can get hurt. Obviously there are germs and shards of glass all over the floor. How dangerousth!". Guy smiley lisp speaking bitch, how dare you touch me on the shoulder and scold me publicly and think I am serious. Actually, go ahead, you look like an ass.

Ever see two grown men go at it with neckties on? A big scene probably but I just ended it telling the guy to relax, stop talking in my face and chew on a wintergreen Altoid, let the guys get their replacement case of Corona, and let me just grab my cheese. Maybe the whole Altoid thing was a bit immature to say but the guy had major halitosis as if his mouth and asshole were one. It takes a lot for me to tell someone to pop a Tic Tac in their mouth but this guy needed toilet paper for his mouth with his breath and all the shit he was saying. I was totally non-threatening, but feeling threatened, the nosey bitch, computer whiz, get rich quick prick replied, "Hey, my daughters are waiting for me at home!".

Okay, and...?

I'm not going to stab you you nosey bitch, computer whiz, get rich quick prick! I don't have a knife under my necktie. I'm just asking you to go home to your daughters and let me buy my cheese.

Cunt, you made me forget to buy a baguette!